Being a doctor’s wife has it’s ups and downs. Yes there are the long work hours, the unpredictable schedule, and the seemingly endless years of training. Yes our husband’s job is stressful and often they come home exhausted and emotionally unavailable. But there are some great things about being married to a doctor that I sometimes take for a granted. I try to remember these things when times get hard. Because really, not everyone gets to be married to such amazing people who also happen to be doctors.
1. You Have A Bright Future
This one is for those of us in training. If your DrH is in medical school, residency, or fellowship, remember that you have a bright future ahead of you. The training years are hard but at the end of them is the promise of a respected career with a comfortable lifestyle. Not necessarily a swimming-in-money lifestyle, but you are able to live comfortably with most physician specialties.
How many current jobs have such a promising future ahead of them? Not many. For most people, they hope that they will be able to climb the corporate ladder as they work hard or hope that they have enough interested clients to keep them in business.
For a doctor-in-training, you are almost guaranteed a career and with a large amount of patients who need your services. That sounds like a bright future to me.
2. You Have Job Security
If you are married to a doctor, your husband will almost always have a job. There is no end to the amount of people who need doctors. People are always going to get sick or need surgery. And since there is a major shortage of doctors in the U.S., it looks like there is plenty of work to go around.
This is one of the big reasons why my husband chose to become a doctor instead of going into business, which is what his major was in college. He knew that if you work in the business world you could be let go at the first sign of economic trouble. Remember 2008? Thousands of people lost their jobs at the beginning of the recession in the United States. My husband didn’t want there to be a chance of that happening to him.
The reliable job your husband has (or will soon have) as a doctor is a blessing. Not many professions can offer you this kind of reliable job security.
3. Doctors Do Meaningful Work
What your DrH does every single day as a doctor is meaningful. It can literally change lives. Again, how many professions get to say that?!! I know when I was working as a receptionist in college I certainly wasn’t changing lives.
But as a doctor, your better half literally has patient lives in his hands. He has the potential to change lives by improving and sometimes saving lives. Every time he makes a correct diagnosis and treats it accordingly. Every time she performs another successful surgery. And those crucial times when your DrH catches something that other doctors may have missed. These are all times when a patient life is changed because of something your spouse did. And they do this kind of thing every single day.
4. Doctors Are Respected in Society
Because your husband does meaningful work, he is respected and valued in society. How amazing, to be a part of one of the most respected job professions in the world! Now I know that not everyone admires doctors, that’s for sure. Your husband can tell you stories about patients who hate doctors and think doctors are out there to trick and manipulate you.
But as a general rule, most people admire and respect doctors for what they do. Again, not every other profession is respected like the doctor’s profession is. What an honor for your spouse to be a part of such a noble, esteemed profession.
5. Doctors Are Hard-Working and Dedicated
If you are married to a doctor, your husband knows a thing or two about working hard and dedication. Seriously, they work their butts off just to become a doctor. And they have to be dedicated to it, because it takes FOREVER to finish their training (we are in training right now, so trust me, I know!). It takes years and years to complete their training years, complete with seemingly-endless studying, tests, clinical training, night shifts, being on-call…. The list goes on.
And after they are done with training and are a full-fledged physician, it is STILL hard work everyday they go to the hospital or the clinic. They see so many patients and are often under high-stress situations, with pressure to see as many patients as possible. Many doctors hardly have time to eat, much less run to the bathroom. They work hard from the time their shift starts to the time their shift ends. (And, sometimes even after their shift ends if they are on call and get paged in the middle of the night).
It is seriously awesome to be married to a doctor who knows how to work hard and who is dedicated to something. That dedication and work ethic carries over to other parts of their life, including your marriage and your family.
My husband is such a hard worker, both at his job and at home. I don’t have to worry about him slacking off or not doing his best at his job. He works so hard and is dedicated to his career as a physician. He will do what needs to be done in order to take care of his patients and continue his learning as a doctor.
By the same token, he is also a hard worker in every other aspect of his life. He is so used to working hard, he actually has a hard time slowing down on his time off! When he is home he is usually working hard on a project for our home or organizing something or other. One of his recent projects was to organize our office, because he wanted to. Another project was he built a bunk-bed for our kids. And I didn’t ask him to do any of these things, he just did them! Because he isn’t afraid of hard work.
And another bonus – your hard-working spouse will try to instill this work-ethic into your kids. Your kids will learn how to work hard.
6. Doctors Handle Stress Well
Another great thing about being married to a doctor is they are usually able to handle stress well. Being a doctor is stressful! Sometimes they are faced with life-threatening situations and they have to make important decisions that can have lasting consequences – and they have to make these decision quickly.
I would seriously die of stress if I were a doctor. I do NOT handle stress well, which is one of the million reasons I tell my husband, “I could never do what you do.” But he can do it! Why? Because he is awesome at dealing with stress.
That is such a fantastic attribute for your husband to have! The ability to perform under stress is so valuable. It will benefit your spouse, your marriage, and your family. Stress is a part of normal life too, not just something we find at work. Your spouse will be fine under the stresses of life and help you handle it as well.
7. You Have Easy Access to REAL Medical Knowledge
Isn’t it awesome that our spouses are doctors and that we have access to all sorts of REAL medical advice and knowledge? I say “real” because reading something on Google about an illness is not real medical advice. Sorry to burst your bubble, but it’s not.
Instead, ask a real source. Ask someone who has actually practiced in medicine and been through medical school and residency. That person just happens to be your spouse, you lucky duck. You don’t even have to make an appointment to ask a question – just ask!
Now that doesn’t mean my husband knows everything. Sometimes he will say, “I dunno, you should probably see a dermatologist about that.” And as he specializes more and more he will forget some of the general medical knowledge he has. But it’s great I can go to him first and then go to another specialist if I still don’t have my answers.
8. Doctors Are Smart
If your spouse is a doctor, then your spouse is smart. Duh. They are waaaaay smart. You cannot be dumb and be a doctor – you would never make it.
Thousands of people apply to medical school each year and only a small percent actually make it in. And then they have to actually pass their medical school tests, which are HARD. And then they have to match to a residency program after that, which is also super competitive. And THEN they have to make it through residency and learn so many things at a crazy accelerated speed.
And even after all of the training, they have to keep up with continuing education and licensing exams to keep their license active. It takes smarts to be in this profession you guys. And your spouse is one of those smarty-pants people.
I kinda love being married to a smart person. I love that we can have intelligent conversations and we can work together to solve problems. His intelligence is seriously super attractive.
See? Being married to a doctor isn’t all that bad. There are some great perks. Try to remember some of these the next time he is on call or the next time he works a night shift. Yes there are ups and downs to being a doctor’s wife, but it’s good to focus on the ups.
** Image from Pixabay